I/3 of my class didn't bother to show up for physics today. This is bad, because he spent at least a half hour explaining to people how to use Mathematica today, and that'll be hard to catch up with on their own. The physics people get a nifty lab with computers, oscilloscopes, breadboards and niftiness! I want one! Bah. And I can't take the class that uses it, because it has too many prerequisites. Being a senior kind of sucks, because you start to realize that you'll never get around to taking a lot of cool stuff. I always meant to go back and take Hellenistic Greek, and that isn't going to happen either. I really want to learn Attic Greek, but we only offer Hellenistic. I wish I were going to get to take more physics in general, too. Also that I'd had time to do more theatre tech stuff. 4 years isn't long enough. It's funny, I really didn't feel that way about high school. I was so ready to leave by the end of my junior year that I didn't really even consider "flunking" a class so I'd stay for a "real" senior year rather than graduating early. heck, I could have just scheduled the wrong classes so I couldn't have met graduation requirements. But I was ready to get the hell out of there. Academically, I didn't really feel like there were any classes left for me. Most of my friends were going at least half days at college while still in high school so they could find really challenging classes. But at college I feel like there are still so many classes I want to take. I'm going to have to put myself through math and computer science hell this year in order to have any background for grad school, though. No fun fluffy classes for me. More annoyingly, no indulging of esoteric interests and classical stuff. I always wanted to take the Old Testament class. It's supposed to be really neat. Ah well.
I watched more 90210 episodes today, too. The ending to one of them really bugged me, though. The message "hey kids, when you're visiting a friend of yours in the psych ward, don't forget to smuggle in something that they don't have, because that's part of being a thoughtful friend" seemed a bit off to me. The scene went more or less like this:
Brandon: I thought we'd watch the game together.
Generic suicidal one-shot character: Can't. There isn't a tv here.
Brandon: No problem. *pulls little tv out of jacket pocket.*
Somehow, this strikes me as bad. Frankly, from the stories I've heard from friends and online, people who are hospitalized for attempting suicide are carefully searched and aren't allow to have a lot of things. If they're allowed visitors, those visitors should certainly not be bringing them things without checking with the nurses first. I dunno, it bugged me. More than things on that show usually bug me, which is going some. Also in that episode, they got their SAT scores back and they were all happy when they got scores of around 1190 or less. My scores were higher than that when I took the SAT as a high school freshman! Gah! You'd think they would have portrayed *someone* as getting genuinely spiffy scores. I guess none of them are supposed to be particularly bright, though. But it cracked me up that those were portrayed as especially good scores. Maybe I'm way off, though. My real-world sample is a small cluster of geeks. I got a 1410 my junior/senior year, and an awful lot of my friends can beat that. I got an 800 verbal, though, which only a few of them did. Why am I babbling about this? Gak!
My internal clock is all of the messedupness. It's nearly 4am, and my brain thinks it's time for adventures. It wants to drive to Seattle or something. I hate it when it gets "go to Seattle" cravings. Sean would NOT appreciate me showing up on his doorstep at around 7am, even assuming I did know where he lived these days. Part of me wants to write down an elaborate chronology of the whole relationship, reconstructing dates of important events from vague journal entries, old chat and ICQ message logs, emails, notes in the margins of what were supposed to be class notes, and entries in my car mileage book. I could make a special section of my website for it. I also want to make one long mixtape of the relationship in song lyrics. I had a bunch figured out, but never got around to finishing the list or mixing it. Now that I have a burner, I could even make a cd. Gah! this is even less constructive than my SAT score ramble! Next thing you know, I'll be waxing maudlin over Becky again. That's always fun.
No, brain, that was not a suggestion. *thunks head against wall.*
Welcome to my 4am world.
This entry is long, rambling and pointless enough that it probably belongs in my other journal, but I'm too lazy to move it.